Woman + Babies = Mush

I have to admit I was not the strongest person emotionally before I had kids. I would cry when I was super happy or sad. Now that I have kids though I am a complete mush. I cry over everything now and no its not postpartum. I mean I cry when my kids do something new, when they out grown clothes, when T says a new word or does something cute/funny and I cry almost every time I see Connor smile, it's the sweetest little smile. 

I used to think I was the only one who did this but after talking to fellow mommies it sounds like this is just part of motherhood.  Could it be a hormonal change? Could it just be because we love them so much? Or does motherhood make you a wuss?

I think it's a combo of all of the three. The things our bodies go through to produce a little human being. Even after having two kids I still question how in the world do they fit in there. It's just the most amazing thing to me and just thinking about how I created these perfect little boys makes me tear up.

The love I have for my babies is so deep. When they fall my stomach literally drops because the thought of them getting hurt actually causes a physical reaction in myself. To describe it, it's like when you go over a hill to fast in your car and you get that funny feeling in your stomach. It almost tickles and that's the feeling I get when I think one of my kids might hurt themselves. I think its because they come from me so I have a deeper connection to them that way.

I also think Motherhood has made me stronger and weaker in many ways. I can function on a lot less sleep, I can handle alot more stress and I think faster on my toes then I used to. I also feel weaker in some aspects. I cry over the little things they do because I am sooo happy or excited for them. I  think a little slower because all I do is narrate my day, sing ABC's, read kiddie books, watch learning cartoons and baby talk (to Connor) all day long so when it comes time to have an adult conversation it's almost a strain.

With all the ways Motherhood has changed me I was not prepared to become a mush over my kids. Before I had kids I would see a mom with her child and laugh over the way she would talk to them like they understood in the grocery store. I would think to myself when I become a parent I am going to be different but little did I know or understand what a mom is and what she does for her children. I used to think my mom was such a wuss and didn't understand why she would tear up all the time over little things. Now... not only do I look just like her but I cry just like her too and I am 100% positive my kids will roll their eyes at me, just like I did my mom, when I start to cry over something little.

I always say I have my dream job. I think its such a blessing that I am able to be with my kids all day everyday. I would not trade the long days and nights for anything. I am proud of my mushiness because without it I would not have beautiful boys!